matt stearns talking to me through a line... asking me to go to the beach,,, to go to copley square and go to the beach there (somehow) and then im saying no and yelling at him and hes saying we could just walk on the beach somewhere else where its raining and i am saying no and yelling but coriander is there somehow and we are listening to it like its on a radio show...

its thanksgiving and brandon and christopher and wendy are there and all the animals (edna chloe lightly gilbie) and i guess i make a cage for gilbie outside in the old rabbit cages and then days pass and it rains, some time goes by and we dont know where gilbie is and i go outside and the rabbit cage cage i made for him is filled with mud and all wet and there are people out there i dont know doing something else too and gilbie is all wet with mud in the corner of the enclosure

and i pull him out and have a dread hes going to be dead but his eyes are big and blue and hes still alive and hes ok and i bring him inside and he dries off right away and starts running around and i notice him and the cats are the same size (more hamster size than cat size) and chloe is running after them and they are all playing in erik's room

night before last

i am watching fiona apple singing a song either one of her songs or a cover, she sings it differently than i've heard it before. i'm talking to her about how much i like it. first she's on stage and then she's right backstage or to the side stage, and she's doubting herself and is very real. i love how she was singing.

it is sunny and warm and we are outside. there is in air of excitement.

Sara silk is there at some kind of building / outdoor event we are preparing a show almost a live show kind of like SNL and our parents will be there almost like we are going to go live on air, I am telling her we can dothis one thing I have prepared, feels like I have this whole set prepared, not sure if it's a comedic skit or music, seems like I have a whole musical set prepared but I am looking at her like we are going to do it together and like I have it all in my head and we are about to have to go, there is some kind of time pressure following when we start like it's going to be broadcasted, I had this brilliant idea and feeling like we could do it in sync and we would know how to do it, but as we're about to begin I am starting to doubt myself and thinking I can't remember or maybe I will forget the whole set, the whole plan, there are lots of people around like its a live performance as well. She is wearing glasses I think and we are kind of just looking attach other anxiously but reassuring at the same time about to go forward with this thing and I'm not sure I remember my idea

Very familiar sympathetic and trusting relationship to Sara silk in all these dreams

the night before last, after going to the meditation seminar with Rajshree Patel:

I am at the course. We all have our cloths and flowers and are gathered outside the church, maybe in a cemetery. Rajshree is there. There are more people than I expected. Perhaps I'm not sure if they wanted me to come. There is something she said to me I can't remember.

last night:

I see Rajshree again but she looks different and she is walking down stairs like the stairs of the apartment on cambridge street before the hess station where the young guy and the old guys hang out on the stoop...she is chanting and saying hare krishnas and other mantras out loud, some that i thought weren't supposed to be spoken.

I wake up around 5 30 in the morning to pee and I am dreaming that Alyssa Murphy is a radio personality. It suits her very well and I remind myself to remember it and tell her. I think I am phoning in to her station in the dream or I am in the booth with her and we are bantering back and forth. I guess it is sort of like the Ricky Gervais podcast show.

As I am starting to fall asleep I am thinking about the ring in the book Seabiscuit where the author or the jockey is a small boy and is watching an older jockey ride this horse around the ring. It is just the sandy ring and a greyish watercolory scene, grey blue sky, little grass, maybe trees, mostly the ring, the color of sand, the fence and the jockey on his horse going around and around. The ring is small. I guess maybe I am the little boy.

Then I am remembering the view from the window in the movie Mr. Lonely with the Michael Jackson impersonator and the Marilyn Monroe impersonator and the Charlie Chaplin/Hitler-esque impersonator. I am just looking out the window of the movie onto this lush greenery that goes on forever.

Then I am dreaming that I have just arrived somewhere. I am seeing Paige. I guess I am in Charleston but first I am with Paige and that seems different. Maybe it is New York to Charleston but it all seems like Charleston. I go to Paige's house and Chelsea is there and maybe Will.

I am with Paige or leaving and we get in a car with Rix and the driver is the Haittian guy Nobel from the T the other day. He is like the cab driver I guess. I have a small amount of pot I think but Paige says he'll have drugs and I think he rolls a joint or has a joint. We are going to Rix's trailor to see Pat. I run into the trailer when we get there and look around for Pat. Rix says something and he appears and acts very casual and cool at first and very non- Pat like. He is smoking a Marlboro Red and seems to present himself differently. Then we go outside and the trailer area sort of seems like that dog-show me and my mom went to once somewhere in New England. I tell Pat its ok I have something that he wants- either a cigarette, a lighter, or a joint but probably a joint.