i am at the college and the art department is getting ready for the susan b. anthony award. all the professors submit and students may also submit. i am freaking out inside because i think the due date is that night and i dont have anything and don't think i should really submit. the college is at UVA and cliff is in the rotunda. barbara has made a submission which has a blue matress quilt thing and then a lamp and a piece of paper, all the colors match, its an arrangement of objects and it looks genius. then i go to class with cliff and he hands everyone stuffed animals to make our projects with. he brings me over a bear and brushes the side of my face with his hand. when i leave and go out side john says the submissions arent due until thrusday so i think about maybe trying to make something. it is like a carnaval-ish in the street outside.

when i first fall asleep i am awake when i start to dream/ realize i'm dreaming. i feel a persons body sitting up in front of my body. in my dream i have a sketchbook and i keep drawing things in it over and over, i see peacock and also barbara and that starts informing all the drawing.

* also in this dream i see cliff's sketchbook and studio. in the sketchbook he has many little drawings with a small found object incorporated. one is some sort of mouse wearing clothes next to a matchbox and a button is glued on the page as part of a table maybe

september 16th 2009

i am with barbara duvall in an upstairs class room, she is my english teacher. i tell her i havent read the book and i will fail the test, she tells me not to come to class today and it will be okay, she doesn't mind and she understands. then she starts using a camera, she is now a photographer, she shows me some pictures of her as a child, then she rubs lotion on my face ( the kind of lotion they put on pregnant peoples stomachs to do the sonagram) and takes pictures of each side of my gace as if it were a sonongram. i think she is really great and we like each other and i shouldnt have been so afraid of her. then maria/ sara silk comes into the room and we start playing dress up with all her stuff, she eventually has to kick us out or i wake up