I am on some kind of journey, traveling through the city. Hard to say if its Boston. Like I'm getting picked up in a car. I am living in a house somewhere. Kind of like there is a community of people around me and I'm doing something for the community in running around or housing them. Then I am out on the yard and Rob Potylo is there and we are next to each other on the grass and there is something like a small dog or something- there is something like a baby and the baby is on the grass in between us and rob and my foreheads come together over it and we're looking in each other's eyes. I feel like home again in the dream and want to take him inside and feel like I can stop running.

Night before last I am on a couch in Ricky's apartment. Its like his old apartment only the couch is in the bedroom and where the kitchen is is where his bedroom is now. I don't go into the bedroom but I am there and then Rob Potylo is there and he is next to me on the couch. Ricky comes in and he is going to leave to go into the bedroom. I don't move and he gets pissed off and then goes into the bedroom but doesn't bother us. I stay on the couch with Rob and then there is something like love-making.

Traveling with Erin and Leslie and maybe their parents, further and further down into the ocean, going further down each level on a series of steps. We are traveling down staircases and Erin keeps jumping and then landing on the bottom steps like she forgot they would be there or something and then she sits there and cries, almost like a character that keeps messing up on a video game. It is like a giant caver that becomes the ocean. At the bottom of the steps before I wake up there is shallow water and I look into the water and see little sea unicorns. I wake up and draw the sea unicorn.

Carol Anne is there, taking me under her wing somehow. It seems like I'm in Charleston, I'm in some kind of art building, seems like I've been here before. There is a big open space that can just be my personal studio I realize if I just go there and claim it. I am in the buildings and part of one turns into a grocery store. Lots of space the way things are set up almost like the behind the set scenes in the movie 'american splender'. Travis is there with me. Carol Ann is alone in an office somewhere or I'm just leaving her or have to leave. I want to be alone and then my mother is there or Thanksgiving is coming. I think about shoplifting from the grocery store. There are eggs in the shape of limp bananas I have in my hands-- I give them to Travis because I'd rather eat them alone and he warms them up and comes back with them and then I say ok I'm leaving. Its kind of like a venue and a community and a library all in one that I'm leaving. I guess I am getting in a car to go home for Thanksgiving.

Rob shoplifting a bag of chips because he knows that's what I do

I'm with Taylor cleaves and her boyfriend I guess and Sarah Lyle at a Chinese restaurant and there's barely anyone there and we're talking about splitting up the food and Taylor is saying to take more because I paid more. The room has a stage kind of like the middle school set for a school play only its a Chinese restaurant.  Before that I am in New York with Jonathan.

Night before last night's dream

Little Kenny comes to visit my parents house why h is open like its their house but the t.v. Set version or something. Before that Tory invites me to come out for her birthday. My mom wants to take me out for my birthday with aunt Annie. Pammie is there too and Erik. Jonathan is in town and meeting up with Shannon and calling me when me and Lindsay get to the hull restaurant called sailors or something so were all there at the same time. We drink white wine . Then I'm at my parents house talking to Tory about going away somewhere and I wonder if max is coming. Little Kenny is talking but no ones talking to him excepted dad, about sports. I notice little things he's saying that are turns of phrase and not quite true. He has little blue slippers on his feet and they are near me in the living room so I roll away. We end up in something like a tree house or a house addition, seems like in hull. Rob is there and was there before or I was with him before I left to go to all these reunions. When I'm at the house I keep trying to make us cheese sandwiches with this cranberry but bread that is laying out but I keep getting interrupted. In the tree house ish room we are back together only someone else is there and little Kenny and we are trying to get it on. We start making out and stuff and he looks like a different person, very feminine in the face like a Mexican lesbian lady and kind of meaty and shorter but with the same tattoos. We are in some kind of Chinese boxing place before that where Asian girls are competing in gymnastics and I have been there before. Certain things play like videos I assume rob and I are watching that are scenes from my life; one I am filming and feeding animals, a snake maybe an ostrich, I am with some friends and all these animals and my hair is long, another I am a small person like a child wearing a blue machinist looking outfit and trying to board a train

With rob in the back of a car maybe a limo and he is wearing a hat with black lettering that says lemonade USA . At first I think it says Lego something. He is saying how I act like I'm on candid camera all the time and how he recognizes a lot of himself in me. I ask what he means when he says I act like I'm on candid camera and he says its like I'm always on tv.

Something like we're at AudioPro like we're supposed to be working maybe but its not audio pro- rob is there,maybe elliot. a long kind of building with many rooms. When I say it, it sounds like new alliance. I can't remember what was happening exactly.

I come to see Jeryn. I'm in Paris and she's living in Paris, almost feels like a past experience. I go to her apartment. I'm not sure why we're living there.

Talking to Cliff Peacock. We are on some kind of cruise ship that seems like the beginning of college and turns into Thanksgiving at parts. I am sitting at a table and Cliff is talking to some people and being funny and I'm listening. Then we are in some kind of studio, I have workup against one wall and some kid in the class is looking at it and asking about it. A disney pixar movie starts playing and one of the studio areas is curtained and roped off. When I go by its a hospital room and maybe the whole things a hospital too. When I'm not with Cliff it turns to Thanksgiving and I'm in the sun room and Kenny is talking about how many glasses of wine my mom has had as if 3 or more is a good sign. Lots of people are in the sunroom, little Michael. When I pass Cliff again its by a staircase and I ask him something about how things are going because hes been joking around and seems like things are going well but somethings wrong, he says something that seems like he's paying to get his child out of jail or something. We sit down facing each other and I notice hes gotten a long facial tattoo going from his right ear horizontally across his face kind of like a fish hook but hes not Cliff quite in the moment he's almost someone else. We are sitting on the top of the bleacher seats looking out to the edge where we can see the city of boston, tops of buildings and we watch them crumble and roll under the edge of the horizon.

I am trying to get to Maria's birthday party. Its kind of in my parents house but its like a mansion. Maria lives there and she is still with Henry. I get there early. Its sort of like highschool graduation, like everyones going off to college or something, the end of the summer. I get there and am thinking I need to provide music or something and she says she is going to play and I realize she is playing guitar I think and singing now. I don't see the guitar so not sure why I think that. Henry's room is like the rock and roll room she says.  I'm glad shes doing something for herself and suprised. This is going to be a big party and everyone is going to be there. Will is coming or gets there. Bobby Olsen and Bryan Gaynor are coming. AJ McBride is standing in the front hall of my parents hyouse and Lara Dennis is standing there talking to him. He morphs into AJ Mcbride or I have to remind myself that's who he is, something like so I can remember I'm not envious or competitive over AJ. She is wearing bright pink shirts and big dark sunglasses and a white floppy hat and a lot of her is obscured so that I can't tell its her at first.  It is like shes come to get AJ from a lame situation and shes trying to talk about what they're going to do. A different scene than with Maria which seemed more downstairs.  Rob Potylo is there too somewhere, maybe a different dream. He is wearing a colorful outfit, has the tiger hat, sort of lolling around like in a dream world/ state or with other people where he is somewhat at a distance, we don't get close or talk or if we do I don't remember now.

the night before last night, next to rob potylo

Rob Potylo and I are in a car, I am driving. Its late at night kind of like we are coming back from a trip like rob and I's trip to Austin. We come up to this bridge and its bright blue, as if plastic coated in bright blue. I watch as the blue part of the bridge comes off like a weird scraping slithering thing that leaves the under structure of the bridge intact but to the right over the edge of the bridge the part of the bridge that has come off like a skin is laying over the side rails, a blue ladder of plastic/metal like for a tree house. Rob doesn't notice somehow and I tell him to look. I don't know whether to drive or not, other cars seems to be going through but you can't see what happens to them. The blue overcoat of the bridge suddenly slithers back over the bridge structure and we go forward.

End up in a small downtown area like china town and people i know in boston are milling around. I see these lego men with flat pin sized tops instead of heads and scoop them up off the sidewalk, plus a coffee grinder kind of kitchy magnet. Then Vic from Audio Pro comes up behind me and hands me a flyer and says they are having a sale. I guess he works at the place behind me where I think the magnet and legos have come from. Ethan Marsh is across the street and has green hair and I say something to him and he comes over and starts doing lines from some "funny" broad comedy, popular in recent history. 

I am moving out of n apartment and supposed to go somewhere like cape cod with Tyrone and my family. Paul is moving out of the same apartment and gets all his stuff out. I move my stuff out but forget about my clothes and my bed and my cats, edna and lightly, so I have to go back. When I go back into the apartment Rob Potylo is in the empty room around the corner. I see him and we start talking. There is a little puppet man hanging on a wall or on his bureau and he tells me my father is an electric toothbrush. I am holding an electric toothbrush and turn it on and off and keep trying to figure out what he means by this. I keep saying "you're father...was... an electric toothbrush?" I know he means this little puppet thing to be his father. Then he kisses me. At first it tastes a little weird but right after it is nice and natural. He is not wearing a hat this whole time and I cansee he is balding and it doesn't bother me. We hug and kiss and I keep going back to this in my dream, even with the other stuff still going on. Every time I wake up and fall asleep I'm able to go back with him. I feel like Christiana comes in at some point. Its always best when we're alone.

k

I am working at Audio Pro and Allen is working there too, he is maybe even older than regular, and his name is J.D. He is leaving the shop. There is a kind of broken flag by my bench in the shop and I am trying to move it somewhere. I go out to the front of the shop and stick it under a porch swing type thing that is raised up at the top of the doorway which is all glass and on either side of the doorway are two glass shop window display areas, with rustic looking stuff in them, like a garden display-ish but more wood. I stick the broken sign/flag up under neath this and whoever is behind me says its not a good idea.

There is another point where I am putting something in the sink, something maybe the size of a shirt, something I don't believe will be sucked down the drain but it does get sucked down the drain and my father is standing there with me in the kitchen with a face, or spoken, like "see?"

I'm at my parents house with Vince and its like he's taking care of us all at my parents house. Rob is there sitting on the couch in the living room by the window. Vince gets up at some point and I know then hes been lying next to me on the couch under the sunflower painting. He is wearing very short shorts at first I think maybe his underwear but they are just short tennis shorts, more like womens' clothing. Dave is there or not there and we get into an argument about Dave. I say I think he's content living his life the way he is living it and will continue that way and Vince is saying he needs to change or that he's doing something wrong. I think we are eating ice cream, maybe banana cream made from the blender.

Dreaming I'm with Paige and maybe Meaghan Cannon, Lindsay. We are in L.A. and all take Molly and go to this restaurant only I haven't really taken enough of it and forget that everyones getting high and go between just trying to be at the restaurant and act normal and trying to take more molly because I remember we're doing drugs.
I think maybe I am there to film a show.
Ate too much the night before and feel uncomfortable in the dreams.
Somebody thats supposed to be Vince in a way but isn't is more like someone else from somewhere, some red-headed guy, younger than Vince. Sort of a woodsy swimmer character. I sleep with him in a chair and we have a weird kind of relationship. Afterwards I think its Vince.
Someone saying something about my lips how I have nice lips or big lips.

I am going to a big bed somewhere to sleep with Will and then I remember I have my period and tell him and he turns into Olga and goes to the other end of  the bed and says he doesn't have sex on his period.

I am trying to get someone to go to New York with me. I am living in Norwell with my parents it seems like but I have the mini-van. I get Monica to say she is going with me but then something happens and she gets weird about it or she won't come for some reason...maybe something to do with pot. Lindsay is around at some point too but she can't go to New York...

I think I end up taking a bus and I show up in New York and its different, its that weird street that is kind of like the NYU dining halls, a combo of that and the weird stretch between Harvard square and central where they6 have the restaurants you can see through the windows and kind of look like a strip mall and there's the weird square type cement step thing behind it. Its night when I get there and I go up or down an escalator.
I turn up and walk out through a series of parking garages and end up in a mall. I am carrying things with me, something heavy.

I find Jonathan and we leave and are walking I think but it feels like a car. We are talking and I am worried about him and happy to be in New York. I ask him who his best friend is and he can't answer. He says he goes over Tyler's often and makes a remark about his apartment and how gaudy it is, as if it is all gold-plated but very small (reminds me of the discussion on Psy and the subtext of Gangam style). We are in his apartment, it doesn't feel like New York. I drop my bags there.

I am walking around an industrial type space with Rob Potylo. At some point we go into a building I think may be a school. I think we come in from an elevator and walk out. Ryan is in the building and walks by and sees us walking together and goes berserk about it. Like "oh now this is whats going on, just great" as if this is a direct affront to him. Rob does not react much and I feel a little weird but try not to react either. We walk outside and either he is following me or I am following him. We go through an area that seems like the tracks of the orange line at Mass Ave. It is different than other dreams in that we don't touch much or it feels like even talk much but there is a comfort somehow between us.

I go over to Rob Potylo's house. I am somewhere else. Some other kind of space exists before this part of the dream...
We are making out. It is like I am in the sun room with someone else right before, maybe Ricks... something like a sleep over where I leave where I'm supposed to be sleeping with this other person and Rob comes in or I find him somehow and then we are together and under covers and blankets and together all night,

kind of like how it was with Blue in a way

few nights before the last post

I am on some kind of ship like a cruise ship but with a big ampitheater like maybe the Titanic. My mom and my dad are both there along with a lot of other people. I am holding onto a big shaggy white dog but aware of another dog that I was supposed to be taking care of or was once taking care of that isn't around anywhere and I am partly worried about where it is. It seems stormy and raining. Then there is a little weasel like animal that I am holding and talking to and I think its Lighly and then it runs out of my hands and outside and I go follow it. Then I am around the side on the outside of a house, like maybe where I would imagine David Sedaris was drowning the mouse in the bucket and the animal has turned into a white weasel or rat and is in the bushes and I am trying to recapture it and talk to it and I'm afraid of losing it. I don't know what happened to the ship.

I go over to Christiana's house to hang out and Rob Potylo is there in another room. He comes into the kitchen for a minute and I talk to him briefly and I'm shy but Christiana can tell that I like him, I guess. When he goes back into the room (it seems like there are a lot of people in the room) she says she can help me and I know that she means help me to talk to him or help us get together or something. We go upstairs into her room which is kind of like a fort on the side of the house. Their house is kind of like their real house but different with more rooms and like there are more people living there. Her room has a rickety built staircase, I remember the staircase seeming like it was made of vinyl and could break at any minute but she said it was old, from the 70s or something. Up the stairs is a wood board platform where her bed is and we lay together in the bed and I feel very comfortable with her, almost like she is someone else I know very well already... I relax and joke around with her and feel very loving toward her and can tell she just wants to be friends and that we can help each other and be good friends together. I think maybe she is going to cut my hair. I don't know if we talk about Rob.

from last week

I am in a building like a town hall or a school. Will is coming to town with his band and they are about to be big or something. I am in the front hall/foyer of the building when he gets there. There are lots of people around. Will sees me and picks me up and we are hugging each other and I'm higher than all the people around me. Will says that the band needed a singer and he was thinking I could do it. It is kind of like we are

Dreamed I moved back in to 7 Price road with Rachael Hayes and her boyfriend Justin. I guess I had been living in Watertown and needed a place to live. I think I was in lower Allston right before. More of a bohemian transition where moving around was easy. I move in to the apartment and its a bit different. There are three bathrooms and my room has a bathroom. I suggest we have a cleaning day party and really scrub all the surfaces partly because I feel this way and partly to ingratiate myself with Justin, which seems to work or anyhow he seems to like me much more than in real life recently. I'm aware of these things while dreaming.

I am looking for Will and can't find him. Have a recurring experience of "juicing" in the dream state this comes as an epiphany of how juicing cleanses the body and helps me to sleep- in my dream every time I "juice" this signifies a bodily feeling as well as a day or hour,  after the juice I experience sweet, dreamy sleep. It seems like I have gone through a long cycle like this. By the time I wake up it is 12. 

I am riding in the back seat of a car with Sarah Lyle, unsure where we're going but we've missed something then realize we are both hungry then realize Uncle Gene is driving the car and little Ken is in the passenger seat and we are driving to a bar where my father is going to meet us. Ken is talking about how he is going to get sauced with my father. On the way there we look out the windows and its all country side. I see what looks like a black and white pig on a leash.

Before this I am trying to meet Rob Potylo and I talk to him on the phone about meeting at his house. I go to his house and its all people that Rachael knows and they all don't talk to me and act like they hate me and don't want me to smoke their pot and Justin #1 is there and I try to get Rachael to come over and help me. I am nervous to meet  Rob and looking for him in the dream, knowing its a dream and he might look different but I don't see him or feel him in there, that I remember.

Vince has a house somewhere like in Hull that young people in bands go to to practice/ work/ hang out. It is one floor with a few rooms and dark inside but warm and sunny and summer outside, by the ocean. I am there with Rob and we have instruments. Later I am in a similar house or the same house and I have a twin sister and we both have guitars and I think she is going to leave.  My mom is there and I see her leaving or am looking to sneak out and away before my mom realizes.

Sara Silk and I are sitting at a table with someone across the table, I think Kelsey. We have notebooks out and are working on a song we are supposed to have written. Sara Silk starts rapping and her rap is very fluid and good and I realize I've forgotten to write my rap, I start writing one ;

Yo, let me pour some gravy
Theres a few in the marines but theres a boatload in the navy

Before/ after this I am in Fortpoint area and it seems like a warehouse. I go to see John Cremona and there are other people there. He seems like he is going a little manic because of the attention of the community, its kind of like 300 summer with all the doors off and partially outside, a bit like a warehouse party in Charleston but still Fort Point, in one part there is a cement square open space between the buildings with painted murals on the walls. Glinda is there and they are both a bit on edge. I think of how the situation with my father would explain something and wonder why I don't tell them. John Cremona looks more and more like David Bowie and I wonder if he is David Bowie. He is supposed to perform for somebody like a critic or a small audience. We are in a room with a piano and some framed photos on the mantle of the piano, not quite John's studio and he grabs an electric guitar and kneels on the floor with his knees flat and his feet behind him. He shows us that he is superhuman or a musician because he starts to play this song and while he does his face goes back and forth between being covered in makeup and being normal, each time it goes back and forth a little different, clown makeup but different colorings, white with blue clown tears and then black. After this he goes around with Glinda and is giddy. On the stairs he is jumping around and acting kind of like a wild man. I am not doing much but silently being there/ supporting him, ready to defend him but no one really tries to attack him on anything even though I feel like maybe he is expecting it and its influencing his actions.

End up in a kind of castle made of sand - like on a tour somewhere like I've been there before. At the top it is a circular room with light sand walls and a hole in the ceiling of the room letting light in with a ladder coming down into the room. Next to the ladder an old asian man is standing holding a turtle and offering to sell it for meat. I know he doesn't mean this but I'm not sure how I know. There is a first and second time in the room. The second time I know to go up the ladder and wait for the asian man to come up and then feed him a banana.

I dream I am living in this weird like mansion-house almost back in charleston with will granberry. I see rob potylo and tell him it was nice to meet him. Then I am is somewhere else but go  to our house and rob potylo          is there and we start talking and getting along. He is nicer and shyer than I thought, drinking a glass of white wine which he doesn't finish and says he doesn't drink (maybe because of his mother). He has a hairy nose on the outside of his nose but I don't care about this and note it as important within myself psychologically!

rob potylo/ manhattan

dream I meet up with Rob Potylo (seems like chinatown) and we start walking arm in arm, more like shoulder in shoulder, talking about how its weird how we found each other or how we knew we existed or would exist together like we do then in the moment (this being my fantasy) thinking its happened, strange to wake up -- today have a strange deja vu feeling in chinatown on harrison st?-

the day before that, right before I wake up I am trying to make a manhattan and something to do with pillows or beds or bedrooms- next day at audio pro some guy drops off a bunch of tapes and one is "manhattan"- we think he has been recording movie soundtracks, or could it be the sounds of manhattan?

something with vince i still can't remember, same night as manhattan

dreaming that I stole this large nutroll bar from CVS, like a Payday only more spherical and longer and made of all different types of nuts, maybe featuring Brazil Nuts and held together with honey. Wake up hungry for nuts.

Rob dreams that grass and trees and other organic life is actually black people or made of the spirit of black people (a few days ago).

series of recent dreams out of order

I buy about 6-10 baby zoo animals online at a weak moment. I am keeping them in the mini-van and somehow no one is catching on. They start growing. Some are ok (ostriches, rodent-like animals, marsupials) but others (polar bear) keep growing at an alarming rate and quickly become dangerous. I realize I don't know how to train a bear and that the bear in my mini-van could definitely take my arm off after the bear in the mini-van almost takes my arm off. I start trying to get rid of the animals without letting anyone know I am harboring the animals. Right before I wake up I am with the baby elephant, which is the best one but also the largest.

When I wake up I am concerned for several minutes over the possibility and convenience of drunkenly buying exotic animals online...for very very cheap.

I am in some kind of art show but separate  a series of photos but like I had to take my own photo seperately - to represent myself as an artist or as the piece itself- I put up a picture of myself posing in a similar way to the threee other portraits of three other artists

I should have used a different more abstract photograph that I had that was a real piece of art and keep thinking about this through all my other dreams and before I wake up- a mistake

Across a table from Uncle Gene and he is talking about how he goes to this one place and gets very cheap hamburgers and washes them down with some kind of drink


Right before I fall asleep I see a roasted pineapple slice sculpture/mold shaped like a pig.  It looks like a burnt pig or as I said in the fingernail poem, perhaps, a "charred sausage".
^I tell Ryan this before sleeping