Night before last- donut dream realization

Driving somewhere with michael butler from the butts we fm show and others, stop at some coffee shop called Ray's cafe or something like that

Butts grabs about six sandwiches panini like which are stuffed in a row in front of the cash register like newspapers, he has been here before

I take forever deciding what kind of donut I want,I want all the donuts but am thinking how I should not eat donuts and finally ask the cashier what his favorite donut is and he pulls out a donut that looks like a croissant envelope with a bubble part on top, 

He says it is part muppet 

And it is filled with chocolate, I decide to get this donut but do not have achanceto eat it before I wake up

Waking up and realizing the donuts are not real I try to go back to sleep and eat all the donuts while i still can!

(Real time) yesterday evening walk with frankas to whole foods to buy toothpaste and wander around bakery section while he is in line thinking about my donut dream but not seeing any donuts AND THEN 

Seeing hidden free sample of cut up donuts on a plate and so I take two pieces and give one to frankas (which he throws away) and eat mine because I feel I must and it also tastes good and this must be some dream reality connection, undeniable I think

There is a grey long haired skinny collie like mix dog outside the whole foods and he startles us with his quiet presence when we walk out through the covered parking garage, he has his 

Leash tied

To a pole and were walking away from him, I've gotten down to two inner pieces of the Brady part of the donut which I don't really want and run back

To the dog and give him one piece which he takes semi reluctantly and drops and then eats and once he tastes it gets up and is eager for more,

I make him sit and ask for his paw which he gives me and I give him the second piece, frankas says he wants to go back and brush the dogs teeth but he doesn't and that you shouldn't feed other people's dogs and I tell him

I don't think people own dogs

And remember the time I fed Heather Faile's hot dogs to the dog outside the piggly wiggly

(With some pride)

(Before also this same night we witnessed a dog which sat down hilariously several times during its walk like it had dropsy but was just itching its neck,

Accompanied by a very patient 'owner')

I am freaked out knowing I am dreaming, lucid in the reality of dreaming

Woke up and ate pasta and chocolate cake early in the am (real time)

Feverish lucid dream nightmares I was struggling to wake up from, testing my dreams to know I was dreaming, knew I was dreaming and could not change dreams or seem to wake up for a long time

Looking for frankas and trying to tell him I was dreaming, something like drugs or alcohol getting involved, going to meet alvan or find frankas to go to the cat power show

Get to the cat power show and no one is there and I go outside, there are people there but not alvan or frankas, some Russian girl with blonde hair I am kind of in charge of

Leave the show and get stuck/lost in a food court, my mother is there

Forgetting about time or realizing its dream time which is different and realize I might be missing the cat power show

Get back to the cat power show and I've missed the whole thing and I am so upset and crying and devastated

Go in and it is like a rounded amphitheater seating with all permanent seating kind of like where neutral milk hotel played but smaller you can get right to the stage and cat power is there

She looks so happy and healthy and clean like a flower girl and she has just finished and is handing out some kind of flyer to people

I go up to near the front row and she hands me a poster flyer and touches my arm and says I am a special girl

I try to be happy and am happy and so happy to see her but still so upset I missed the show

Back outside to the food court my mother is there and the blonde Russian girl my mother is with some other people and is leaving I haven't eaten yet and it's all street food carts I see a cart selling perogies

And want a perogies, my mother gives me money and I get a perogies ( they also have big stuffed and fried habanero peppers which iwant to ask how much are they but don't and don't get one) 

There is a blonde guy who is at the perogies stand and starts talking about how insane it is the perogies cost 7 dollars a piece and it's only 200 calories and like drinking water to him

But the perogies is a giant perogies and I am eating it very slowly while he is talking to me and enjoying it immensely 

I remember I told therussian girl we would get a drinkir she wanted to get a drink and I wasn't sure if she meant an alcoholic drink or not, I don't get back to her before I wake up

When I wake up I am so glad thecat power show has not happened yet in real life I was trying together out of that dream for so long

One

I should have just enjoyed meeting her there

I run into some people from high school in downtown Boston and end up getting in a car with Jason tedeschi and Corinne perry, like we are going to a club or something but we end up going to an event like a rich house living room or an event place all windows and white carpeting and it is Andrew ? Bachelor party, Erin fitzgibbons is there all people from high school mostly my grade, we walk in and there are all these different superhero themed pins on the table you can take and pens and pencils with mini troll dolls on the eraser heads, I am taking stuff but semi aware I don't think I was invited to the party, then I realize no one who was invited is really friends with Andrew. My father is there and Andrews mom comes out from behind the crowd over by a row of windows and says someone was sent to pick up Erik and my father almost says something and we are thinking it must be my brother and is my brother supposed to be Andrews best friend? Scooter boi is on a couch behind me sitting next to Michelle Granara and saying something stupid and she is like do you know anybody here? Andrew when I glimpse him looks like an Arab man with dark circles under his eyes. There is a big log in the middle of the room with ropes on either side and Hilary duff is there and has a lisp and wants to start the rope log going, Michelle Granara and scooter and another person all get on the rope log and other people lift it in the air and Michelle Granara is complaining that her parents are holding either side of the rope log and it isn't any fun cause they're holding it too steady. 

Then the dream fast forwards and I realize it is a movie, it must be following Hillary duffs character because it fast forwards to her in a bathtub with a guy and she has a lisp and the guy is saying how she does things like a man has sex like a man and for some reason she turns into a black girl and then there are people still on the sidelines watching because someone maybe scooter yells out ' like a guinea pig ' and scooter says o yah like in Apollo 13 so there must be some guinea pig joke that is a reference to Apollo 13

Like we are making/ watching the movie that is the dream

Frankas dreamt he was fighting people in his fathers living room but trying to mix a song at the same time and trying to convince the person he is fighting to help him mix the song.

some weird alternate emf like universe i take a pill and not sure how many i took by accident more than one and spit them out and they look like tic tacos supposed to be vyyvanse so i know something is up

seems like picnic tables

maybekatie baker

had sex with frankas and then had to have sex with rp for some reason or there was a quick shift in the fabric of time in any case these things happened one after the other and then i realized more clearly and crawled back to frankas and he may have been upset

august 13th

yesterday was dreaming i was going over to lindsay's house and going to tell my dad i was going over and wondering whether i had to ask permission...

frankas woke up and woke me up too at 5 am and i thought oh thank god i can just go over i don't really have to tell/ask my dad

I go down to some horse farm in the woods where I can ride or I know the horses and there are fields and pens full of horses but no one there. The horses are grouped together like cattle with barely any room between them. Many horses are lying down.

There is no one there at the farm and I guess I decide not to ride.

Outside the pens there is an animal tied to the ground with a long leash. At first I think the animal is some kind of tiger creature. It is pale beige with the head kind of like a tiger and the body more like a horse. When I go up to it it lowers its back and stretches its body out as if I were to ride it or get on its back. I try almost to get on its back but it starts moving around and I don't. I take it kind of by the leash looking around to see if anyone is there and start walking down the trail that leads out of the woods. I look down and see its jaw closer and see that its jaw is broken and made of rubber plastic tubing kind of like if a car door were broken or some part of a refrigerator was exposed. I notice it has a collar and dog tags around its neck.

I am walking down the trail out of the woods and there are people on the trail. The leash is down under the floorboards of the ground and this is how I've been able to go so far with the animal without taking it off the leash.

I am going back to where I left Frankas, mostly in some ind of sunroom that has a vague reminiscence of the Merrits basement sunroom overlooking their pool in Hanover, but with more light and no pool. Frankas is drunk or in some kind of spell I can remember from before.

I get back to this place (vaguely) with the animal and notice it is mostly a kangaroo and its back is maybe broken and why is it walking this way as a kangaroo? I think maybe its not the same animal as before (in the dream) but the same pale beige yellow color. tiger horse kangaroo. I can see the animal as I first saw it in the field and then again when it changes to mostly kangaroo.

frankas has an apartment somewhere in like medford but close to watertown and he takes me there from emf

there is no one there but it looks old and lived in and carpeted and musty like an apartment in long island

i move in and at first i have my own room and both my cats are there my room is small and has a twin bed

we start sleeping in one room together and i don't leave the apartment far enough to figure out where we really are and we only go there by car at night it seems

at one point we are at the nearest t station and i am asking people what it is called and they don't know but one woman says it is mount pleasant

back at the apartment i notice there is someone in a room or i go to go in the other bathroom (there is one bathroom in total disrepair where the litter box is kept)

out of the room comes this giant guy that looks like a big tuna and has a whitish face and lips like he's been submerged in water for a long time

i am shocked and alert franks and franks sees the guy who kind of stumbles around and leaves and he just kinda shrugs

i keep wondering if the cats are there and still alive and i go into another room and see he sleeping underneath a bed and there is another bed in the room too which my mother is sleeping in

i guess my mom has moved in with us and it is awkward when we wake her up by being in the room, me first i guess because i look and see the cats and then  i am watching tv on the bed and then frankas comes and finds me

it turns out franks has at least two room mates he hasn't told me about, one is his sister and the other is this girl danielle i think she's called and she starts yelling and talking a lot like maybe there is something wrong with her and maybe she is yelling at another girl in another room

there are only two boxes of cereal for food and i eat some of the cereal and wonder if franks sister is mad at me but it seems like she's not, she seems nice and more level headed than the other girl and maybe like she wanted me to eat the cereal

i don't really talk to them directly though and I'm wondering where frankas is

at one point i go in thhe twin bed room and the bed is all torn up and there is shit on the bed and i don't know what going on

when i go back into the room the next time there is no bed and its more like a rec room or little sewing room and i discover three more rooms after it going down the hall behind it

seems that vince lives nearby with his shop in some alternate universe watertown

in an auditorium inside a hotel-like building to do a show, auditorium looks vaguely like the cofc arts building auditorium or that one in boston, the colonial i think it is...

i ajm going to perform and go down the side stairs in the dark right after before or during eminem performing, he has just rigged up some microphones and lights and stuff and when i walk down thye stairs some of the lights go off, i am wearing heels and he looks at me like am i crazy but i dont care cuz i think its funny and ive got his number somehow

he is being rude to me but in a flirty way or at least i am enjoying it i tell him i live in the auditorium and he says thats a lie, i am nervous to perform i guess

travis is on stage with a few other people and im not sure if we are going up next but then a short kind of chuby girl who is really nice asks if nwe are playing and i say oh ok ill go up

when i go up on stage i transform into a chubby asian woman with glasses for a moment, i am watching 'myself' and attempt to sing 'think of me' from  the phantom of the opera and i am trying to sing correctly and nodding my head to breath and not breathing enough

First I go to Todd Larsons house he has some kind of large apartment or available housing or something

Then I have a new rabbit kind of like coke and the rabbit is outside at night at my parents house and Todd is coming over in the middle of the night and maybe it's about the rabbit? The rabbit is hopping in and out of the street through the bushes and there are no trees there in the front yard separating the yard from the street

There are cars in the street and I am hoping the rabbit is learning and is smart

Todd pulls in and stops at the top of the driveway and I know he is there but then forget and my mother is out in the driveway then to meet Todd I guess

Me and frankas are about to ice skate, maybe in my parents basement, I realize I'm wearing two different skates, one white figure skate one hockey and go to find the other white skate, I find it, my skate may have also been on the wrong foot

Some kind of weird dessert drink in a cup you can make out of jello pudding that expands and then rapidly starts retracting as it cools like plastic

It is Arbor Day... On some kind of long vacation with my mom and relatives and she doesn't want to buy me food, we are in a car ordering food...she ends up getting angry at me...

Marc Maron is sending me sheets of paper like a fax but it seems like we are sitting in the same room together, the sheets are self portraits of Marc Maron all roughly the same

*watching bill hicks standup special and he says "snickers"! And frankezoid remembers he had a snickers in his dream he was buying all sorts of food at the store but he stole the snickers