I go to a bar that is sort of outside kind of like that place in charleston that looks like a gas station...
first i go here or i go to the olsens house- i see bobby olsen and bryan gaynor. bobby and kiley are there and bobby's mom is there so it must be their house. we are all sitting at a table having a sort of formal dinner in a way. I am trying to impress Bobby. Its almost as if I'd gone to new york in the first part of the dream but then we are at bobby's and its as if bobby has moved home and has been living in his mothers house for a long time. It seems like he doesnt have a real job and sort of relies on other people to pay for him when he goes out but he still pulls it off in a charming way. When we are at the dinner table his mom puts out this big ornate book and asks if I know of John Berryman and I say "The dreamsongs?" and then she shows me the book and it is the dreamsongs but the font and jacket are crazy ornate and i couldnt have read it before. I am sitting next to bobby and wonder if his mom and me getting along impresses him.
"
then we go out to the bar and its more like we're in new york. Paige and Meghann and Sinclair all show up and are wearing like bikinis and fur coats and hanging off things and running around, but its like I can't really be there. I am still trying to get Bobby to let on if he likes me or not and I am telling maybe Bryan or whoever I'm with how these are my friends but I don't remember talking to them. They had called me before or something but its like because of where I am I can't have fun the way that they are, even though it seems like we are in the same place.
Monday, July 25, 2011
Thursday, July 14, 2011
I wake up around 5 30 in the morning to pee and I am dreaming that Alyssa Murphy is a radio personality. It suits her very well and I remind myself to remember it and tell her. I think I am phoning in to her station in the dream or I am in the booth with her and we are bantering back and forth. I guess it is sort of like the Ricky Gervais podcast show.
As I am starting to fall asleep I am thinking about the ring in the book Seabiscuit where the author or the jockey is a small boy and is watching an older jockey ride this horse around the ring. It is just the sandy ring and a greyish watercolory scene, grey blue sky, little grass, maybe trees, mostly the ring, the color of sand, the fence and the jockey on his horse going around and around. The ring is small. I guess maybe I am the little boy.
Then I am remembering the view from the window in the movie Mr. Lonely with the Michael Jackson impersonator and the Marilyn Monroe impersonator and the Charlie Chaplin/Hitler-esque impersonator. I am just looking out the window of the movie onto this lush greenery that goes on forever.
Then I am dreaming that I have just arrived somewhere. I am seeing Paige. I guess I am in Charleston but first I am with Paige and that seems different. Maybe it is New York to Charleston but it all seems like Charleston. I go to Paige's house and Chelsea is there and maybe Will.
I am with Paige or leaving and we get in a car with Rix and the driver is the Haittian guy Nobel from the T the other day. He is like the cab driver I guess. I have a small amount of pot I think but Paige says he'll have drugs and I think he rolls a joint or has a joint. We are going to Rix's trailor to see Pat. I run into the trailer when we get there and look around for Pat. Rix says something and he appears and acts very casual and cool at first and very non- Pat like. He is smoking a Marlboro Red and seems to present himself differently. Then we go outside and the trailer area sort of seems like that dog-show me and my mom went to once somewhere in New England. I tell Pat its ok I have something that he wants- either a cigarette, a lighter, or a joint but probably a joint.
As I am starting to fall asleep I am thinking about the ring in the book Seabiscuit where the author or the jockey is a small boy and is watching an older jockey ride this horse around the ring. It is just the sandy ring and a greyish watercolory scene, grey blue sky, little grass, maybe trees, mostly the ring, the color of sand, the fence and the jockey on his horse going around and around. The ring is small. I guess maybe I am the little boy.
Then I am remembering the view from the window in the movie Mr. Lonely with the Michael Jackson impersonator and the Marilyn Monroe impersonator and the Charlie Chaplin/Hitler-esque impersonator. I am just looking out the window of the movie onto this lush greenery that goes on forever.
Then I am dreaming that I have just arrived somewhere. I am seeing Paige. I guess I am in Charleston but first I am with Paige and that seems different. Maybe it is New York to Charleston but it all seems like Charleston. I go to Paige's house and Chelsea is there and maybe Will.
I am with Paige or leaving and we get in a car with Rix and the driver is the Haittian guy Nobel from the T the other day. He is like the cab driver I guess. I have a small amount of pot I think but Paige says he'll have drugs and I think he rolls a joint or has a joint. We are going to Rix's trailor to see Pat. I run into the trailer when we get there and look around for Pat. Rix says something and he appears and acts very casual and cool at first and very non- Pat like. He is smoking a Marlboro Red and seems to present himself differently. Then we go outside and the trailer area sort of seems like that dog-show me and my mom went to once somewhere in New England. I tell Pat its ok I have something that he wants- either a cigarette, a lighter, or a joint but probably a joint.
Thursday, July 7, 2011
I dream I am around for whitey Bulger's trial- it is sort of like being
at camp. We are all sort of hanging out in this camp-yagoog like area like we live there. I think Devon is there. We are sort of waiting around and involved with whitey. I like him but I see him act sort of evil, I think he will take a liking to me though and I will be ok. He is wearing a t shirt with little squiggly cursive repetitive writing across it in a block formation, light blue. He is i9n the passenger side of a truck wearing a sort of trucker hat and thick dark glasses.
Yesterday I dreamed of the hill with the donkey inside the pen on the
side of the road in Williamsburg right as I was starting to fall asleep...and then the picnic tables there and the smell of hotdogs and pasta salad on a plastic plate. Later on I dream we are in a dark room on couches and under blankets watching a movie or something. Then the chorus line of thye little mice in the movie Babe comes into my head and I start singing it and then my Dad is on the other sofa and he starts singing the mice part too and he does a better job than I do, but its very pleasant.
at camp. We are all sort of hanging out in this camp-yagoog like area like we live there. I think Devon is there. We are sort of waiting around and involved with whitey. I like him but I see him act sort of evil, I think he will take a liking to me though and I will be ok. He is wearing a t shirt with little squiggly cursive repetitive writing across it in a block formation, light blue. He is i9n the passenger side of a truck wearing a sort of trucker hat and thick dark glasses.
Yesterday I dreamed of the hill with the donkey inside the pen on the
side of the road in Williamsburg right as I was starting to fall asleep...and then the picnic tables there and the smell of hotdogs and pasta salad on a plastic plate. Later on I dream we are in a dark room on couches and under blankets watching a movie or something. Then the chorus line of thye little mice in the movie Babe comes into my head and I start singing it and then my Dad is on the other sofa and he starts singing the mice part too and he does a better job than I do, but its very pleasant.
Monday, July 4, 2011
I am at something like the Kentucky Derby, I think it is an indoor arena and we are on a flat sort of plateaued section where there are dining tables. I'm here with John Maccallum's "brother" "Jimmy", John's real life brother Neil is also at the table. I have met Jimmy somehow outside of John being there and we are sort of on a date. He shows me how we are going to eat the shrimp with oatmeal. We are all going to have shrimp iin a bowl with either oatmeal or something richer and milkier. This is a big part of the event we are at. This seems to be a rich person kind of event. Alex Wilson is there. People seem to be just roaming around the stadium going from section to section. When John arrives he comes to the table and sees me sitting next to Jimmy and makes that half-suprised/ dissaproving face and sits down across from us. I guess maybe we are in New York. Jimmy seems very smooth and manipulative. I'm not sure why/if/how much I am into him.
At some other time I think Ricky is with me and we are going around moving or around south boston.
When I'm in the stadium there are a few people working there as waiters and servers and I know some of them. They are mostly kids around my age. There is one guy who is black and seems familiar but I can't quite place him. He seems like someone else. I think I am trying to smoke a joint or roll a joint inside the stadium and for some reason I'm doing it semi in secret away from the table. I go into the bathroom or something and come out with the joint and am trying to smoke it by the balcony but its loose and falling apart. One of the waiter people asks me for a hit and I am suprised he knows it is a joint. I remember talking to Alex Wilson and he was wearing suspenders.
When I leave the stadium I see the black guy waiter person and for some reason I don't remember that I know him and then he comes up to me and starts talking to me and I remember who he is. I think maybe I am smoking a joint then and he asks for a hit and I know that he knows its a joint because he doesn't smoke tobacco...He starts talking about how he fucked Cindy something in a little alley right near us (maybe he reminds me of Anson?) He talks about how he wants to fuck every girl he can because its sort of like tagging them and then you have that connection and either they'll help you later on or they won't but either way you fucked them so you own them a little bit and its like growing your wealth in a way, and I say I think there are some women who probably think like that too. His ideas about this are pretty offensive I guess but he is pleasant and mild and isn't trying to sleep with me so we just sort of sit there and talk and its nice. We are on a block of cement steps with hand rails in the middle of an empty parking lot and the street right in front of us is pretty deserted and looks sort of like Roxaboxen and then to the right there is what looks like the end of King street or King and Spring maybe but theres no one on the street and no one else comes out of the stadium.
My mom comes into the scene then and I think the waiter guy comes with us and some other people and we all go to Cole School with my Mom who I guess works there. I am struck by how it smells exactly the same and how I remember the smell. The walls are all salmony-pink and I am smelling them. I really need to use a bathroom and I start going from room to room looking for one. In lots of the rooms there are toilets cemented to the floors in the middle of the rooms but somehow I know or decide these aren't usable even though they are toilets. My mom is scooting around the rooms on what looks like and empty roll of masking tape. She puts one foot on the masking tape and then there is a long handle that comes up and she pushes off with her other foot and I guess this is what she does while she is working. She takes me to the bathroom which is dark like all the rooms because the school is closed. There are three little toilets all with a little piece of toilet paper in them.
When I wake up I realize I really have to pee.
At some other time I think Ricky is with me and we are going around moving or around south boston.
When I'm in the stadium there are a few people working there as waiters and servers and I know some of them. They are mostly kids around my age. There is one guy who is black and seems familiar but I can't quite place him. He seems like someone else. I think I am trying to smoke a joint or roll a joint inside the stadium and for some reason I'm doing it semi in secret away from the table. I go into the bathroom or something and come out with the joint and am trying to smoke it by the balcony but its loose and falling apart. One of the waiter people asks me for a hit and I am suprised he knows it is a joint. I remember talking to Alex Wilson and he was wearing suspenders.
When I leave the stadium I see the black guy waiter person and for some reason I don't remember that I know him and then he comes up to me and starts talking to me and I remember who he is. I think maybe I am smoking a joint then and he asks for a hit and I know that he knows its a joint because he doesn't smoke tobacco...He starts talking about how he fucked Cindy something in a little alley right near us (maybe he reminds me of Anson?) He talks about how he wants to fuck every girl he can because its sort of like tagging them and then you have that connection and either they'll help you later on or they won't but either way you fucked them so you own them a little bit and its like growing your wealth in a way, and I say I think there are some women who probably think like that too. His ideas about this are pretty offensive I guess but he is pleasant and mild and isn't trying to sleep with me so we just sort of sit there and talk and its nice. We are on a block of cement steps with hand rails in the middle of an empty parking lot and the street right in front of us is pretty deserted and looks sort of like Roxaboxen and then to the right there is what looks like the end of King street or King and Spring maybe but theres no one on the street and no one else comes out of the stadium.
My mom comes into the scene then and I think the waiter guy comes with us and some other people and we all go to Cole School with my Mom who I guess works there. I am struck by how it smells exactly the same and how I remember the smell. The walls are all salmony-pink and I am smelling them. I really need to use a bathroom and I start going from room to room looking for one. In lots of the rooms there are toilets cemented to the floors in the middle of the rooms but somehow I know or decide these aren't usable even though they are toilets. My mom is scooting around the rooms on what looks like and empty roll of masking tape. She puts one foot on the masking tape and then there is a long handle that comes up and she pushes off with her other foot and I guess this is what she does while she is working. She takes me to the bathroom which is dark like all the rooms because the school is closed. There are three little toilets all with a little piece of toilet paper in them.
When I wake up I realize I really have to pee.
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