Miscellany retreat 2009

Peacock tells me he loves me, he is obviously attracted to me, he has made a mistake by going on sabattical this semester, he seems to think John Hull now owns me or something, I say- but won't you be back next semester? Won't it be ok?

I move to Amsterdam and run into Alma and also possibly Lindsay Erickson

september 30th 2009

i am trying to write an analytical paper only it turns to cheese and beans and emilianos head floats over it and for some reason this means i need to eat the cheese and beans and with every bite emiliano analizes this action as if it were a point in the analytical essay, or as if he could taste the cheese and beans by my eating it,there is also something with paige and john but i dont really remember....i think something about him feeding her and how he could feed me to, i was very hungry when i went to sleep last night and also had to write an annotated bibliography in the morning...it was very vivid when i woke up, damn citations!

september 29th 2009

I am at Maria's house and I start playing beerpong with Matt Zaccari, only I spill all the beers off the table by accident and Matt starts yelling at me to clean it up, only I can't clean it up and I feel like everyone is sort-of yelling at me and definitely dissapointed, it seems like a big deal...later on Grant is eating peanut butter out of tupperware, I take a spoonful of it and he says oh well just eat all of it, why dont you, i can tell he really wanted that peanut butter, and feel a bit discouraged

september 13th 2009

caroline millard has bleached blonde hair cut short, max sits by me on the couch and i touch him and he moves away (max miller) luke tries to give me 9 dollars when i tell him i dont have any money. we are sort of at eye level art.

september 16th 2009

i am with barbara duvall in an upstairs class room, she is my english teacher. i tell her i havent read the book and i will fail the test, she tells me not to come to class today and it will be okay, she doesn't mind and she understands. then she starts using a camera, she is now a photographer, she shows me some pictures of her as a child, then she rubs lotion on my face ( the kind of lotion they put on pregnant peoples stomachs to do the sonagram) and takes pictures of each side of my gace as if it were a sonongram. i think she is really great and we like each other and i shouldnt have been so afraid of her. then maria/ sara silk comes into the room and we start playing dress up with all her stuff, she eventually has to kick us out or i wake up

september 15th 2009

IT IS THE DAY OF THE LOCK IN, WE ARE LOCKED IN IN THE DARK, SOMEONE IS SMOKING A BOWL OF POT oops caqps) I think maybe ishmael he passes it to me and i take a hit, a girl who is a mix between caroline who dates thomas and victoria nicastro starts but who is supposed to be hirona starts screaming and yelling about this, i tell her its ok that i have smoked a lot of pot before and i wont get wierd and be unable to hang out with her and then she thinks it is ok, after this i realize i have forgotten to bring absolutely everything, i ask if someone can bring me materials or if i can go get them but no one will help me, finally max comes and i secretly get in the car with him to get the materials, he is very drunk and the parking lot becomes an icy ocean, we nearly die continually swerving around big blocks of falling ice, we are ok however and keep driving,

then alex is with us and max miller is driving and we go someplace alex wants to go to a restaurant after, max doesnt feel well, finally we dont go and i end up at home, max is in my fathers office and he says something demeaning to me, something about how i hit on scott debus or something, he says he is not going to the restaurant and going to the lock in now, what time is it i say and he says it is 3 oclock and i have slept all day